Bex in the City

I went for a hike this weekend, with the goal in mind to find the highest peak that I could get to, to get the best picture of the valley, to make people jealous of the gorgeous setting I was in, and just to challenge myself to do something new. 

But along the way, this little canyon with a waterfall came out of nowhere, off to my right. I immediately veered over to the right, follow the new path, and tried to get closer to the waterfall. I just wanted a quick pic, which I would obviously add TLC’s “Waterfalls” to as background music. 

Pretty quickly and shockingly easily, I had found the top of the canyon.  Standing right at the top of a steep drop down the mountain; the waterfall coming out from right below where I was standing. 

And while I was only 20 minutes into my intended hike, I had found something new and better. Something that was exactly what I needed, but didn’t even know I was looking for. A random spot in the woods of Little Cottonwood Canyon, in a new area I’d never been before, was suddenly a spot I could have stayed in for hours. In the middle of the mountains with nothing but the Earth in sight. No one else around, the quiet solitude, with only the sound of moving water, which has always brought me peace and calm. It was serene, addictive, soothing, necessary, comforting, beautiful and mysterious all at once. 

But more than anything, there was just a feeling in that space. Simply put, it felt like home.

Aren’t we all looking for the places and people that make us feel like home? The spaces and energy that make room for you, exactly as you are?

What does “home” mean for you? Where do you feel safe to be yourself? Who welcomes you into their life, with respect and boundaries, but also with love? Where do you feel able to relax and rest, with no performance or promise? With whom can you let go of the need to do, and simply be? 

It is in those places that we find what is meant for us, despite what we may think we want. We find what we weren’t looking for, what we weren’t even ready for, but what we truly need. We find home. 

Home is not where you live, or where you sleep, or where you pay a mortgage or rent. Home is a feeling. 

It is your favorite hike.
It is the swing in your backyard.
It is watching your child sleep. 
It is holding a hand. 
It is a genuine smile from a stranger.
It is working out at the gym.
It is the beach at sunrise.
It is a campsite fire. 
It is watching Netflix and drinking a Diet Dr Pepper.
It is reading a book under a blanket.
It is the look in someones eyes. 
It is the smell of your moms cooking.
It is listening to your favorite musician.
It is sitting together in silence.
It is just feeling good. 

It is peace.
It is calm.
It is safety.
It is security.

For me, home is love. When I feel love given to me, I feel like home.  When I give love to others, I feel like home. 

A long time ago, I made it a goal of mine to always treat every encounter I had with anyone, as the last one I might have. Every text, every phone call, every lunch date, every interaction. I wanted anyone I interacted with to leave me feeling happy, feeling good. 

I don’t always get it right; I’m human, I’m messy, and occasionally fall prey to my own ego and use my powers for evil. (what?!)
But I’m doing my best. And every day I get a little bit better at it. Because while I feel at home with myself, I want those I care about to feel at home with me too. To feel safe, to feel protected, to feel seen, to feel loved. 

So go. Find and be in the places and around the things that make you feel good. Stay with the people that are easy. Go to the places you feel calm. Embrace the people who bring you peace.

Be around the ones who make you feel safe and secure. Wherever feels like home. Because it is within those spaces that you will feel loved and free to be you, exactly as you are. 

XOXO